


Confession (Jedtaviusweek2k19 prompt)

by clumsyghost



Category: Night at the Museum (Movies)
Genre: Google translated Latin, M/M, jedtaviusweek2k19
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-19
Updated: 2019-06-19
Packaged: 2020-05-14 23:52:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19283758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clumsyghost/pseuds/clumsyghost
Summary: Larry's Night Program is a huge success. When the museum is evaluated for historical accuracy, will Jed and Octavius play along?





	Confession (Jedtaviusweek2k19 prompt)

Larry’s Night Program pitch was a publicity success. Ever since the reopening of the Hayden Planetarium, visitors flocked to the museum to check out the new interactive exhibits. Dr. McPhee and museum board were naturally thrilled at the revived interest and ticket sales.

No one loved the Night Program more than the museum exhibits. For three nights a week, their typical routines suddenly held variety: new people to talk to, and the sweetest gift of all, the freedom to be themselves. Which is why Larry felt just a tad bit bad about what he was preparing to say.

“Alright, guys, listen up, please!” Larry coughed and waved his hand until semi-order was established. “As you all know, some professors and history experts are visiting tonight to evaluate the Night Program. You guys are doing a great job so far, but we need to make sure we do everything correctly tonight. That means no earbuds, Dexter,” Larry addressed the monkey. “Everyone needs to be as historically accurate as you can… uh, remember. Also, unless you’re giving a tour, please stay in your own exhibit.” Larry’s eyes swept towards the desk, where two miniatures stood side-by-side.

“Why you lookin’ at us, Gigantor?” Jed crossed his arms over his chest.

“That’s all. Best faces, everyone,” Larry addressed the group. Only when the exhibits began to return to their spaces did the night guard approach the miniatures.

“No more trying to trip people in the car, Jedediah,” Larry replied. “Also, you two are always together. So, uh, you know… I know it’ll be hard for you two to stay apart, but I need you guys to just focus, ok?”

“You have our word,” Octavius nodded.

“Hang on a second,” Jed replied at the same time. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You can’t drive the car tonight because of our visitors. Dr. McPhee is counting on us. If we don’t receive a good report, the board may decide to cancel the Night Program,” Larry held out his hand to offer a ride, but the little cowboy wasn’t having it.

“Nah, partner. The other half. Somethin’ ‘bout it bein’ hard for me an’ Oct to stay apart?” Jed pressed.

“Well…” Larry stared down at the pair. “You guys are…um. Really good friends now. If I don’t see you two together then I just… assume you’re arguing.”

“I don’ really see why you needed to point that out,” Jed mumbled, embarrassed without really knowing why. He finally accepted Larry’s offer of transport, stomping unnecessarily hard as he walked onto the guard’s hand. Octavius followed, looking thoughtful. Larry’s words must have stuck with them, for as the man gently let the Roman General down into his diorama, Jed simply nodded his goodbye. Their parting was a little stilted, both miniatures acutely aware of Larry’s presence. 

The experts arrived; boredom enveloped the Hall of Miniatures. They caught snatches of conversations and footfalls in the distance, but no one came for them for nearly two hours. Octavius had led his men into drills, which resumed with a spark of proud concentration once a human finally ventured near.

The professor was younger than Octavius had predicted, with a neatly groomed beard and square spectacles. He ignored the bench in favor of kneeling in front of the Roman diorama, watching the tiny soldiers go through their motions. After a few rounds, Octavius called for a cease and walked towards the edge. He greeted the man first in Latin, then in English. The professor looked delighted.

“Good evening,” the professor replied cheerfully. “I am here to ask you a few questions, if you don’t mind.”

“Proceed.”

“Let’s begin with your name and rank.”

The questions were easily answered, at first. Pride in his empire lowered Octavius’ defenses. He would never tire of expounding on Roman virtues, their successes and inventions. It was quite nice to talk to a new face, someone who was familiar with his world yet remained curious. The professor typed notes here and there on his tablet. Slowly, the nature of the questions changed. Octavius talked with reluctance of his uncle. The professor moved on to conquest causalities. Memories of battles the general had never fought rose from the shadows of his mind. He grew uneasy.

“How do you think your daughter’s actions reflected upon your government?” The professor peered down at him, thumbs hovering over his tablet.

_Daughter? He had a daughter? Julia. How did he forget her…_ But she did not exist here in the museum. She was not a part of **his** life and yet snips and hazy memories were flooding his mind.

“I…” Octavius swallowed.

“Considering you banished her…”

Octavius frowned. How… how could he have rejected his own child? What kind of parent had he… no, the real Octavius had been, if he could separate himself from his daughter? His stomach felt queasy. The Roman General struggled to maintain his aloof expression.

“Well?”

“Hey! Leave him alone!” A drawling voice, not at all like the Romans’ accent pipped up. “You and your nosey questions are upsettin’ ‘em.”

“What is this?” The professor tilted his head curiously. From the rear of the diorama came a most unusual sight, a little cowboy striding towards him with a scowl on his face. The professor leaned back to check the display to the right. Yes, the Western diorama was next door. That did not explain what a cowboy was doing in Ancient Rome…

“Jed,” Octavius hissed as his friend approached. He was equal parts mortified and relieved to see him. “What are you doing? You’re breaking Larry’s rule!”

“I dun’ care. I don’ like Mr. Nosey Pants here interogatin’ you, and I ain’t gonna stand by and let this happen no more!” Jed stood with his legs planted apart, looking one comment away from drawing his pistols. The professor blinked.

“I take it you two are friends?” A smile tugged on the man’s lips as he studied the pair.

“Yup!”

“I have never laid eyes on this… barbarian before,” Octavius chimed in at the same time.

“You’re denouncing me, toga boy?!” Jed rounded on his friend in disbelief. Octavius wouldn’t make eye contact. “That’s cold!”

“Everything okay in here?” Larry’s voice floated near. “Oh. Great.” He gazed down at the two miniatures with a shake of his head. Gigantor was disappointed, but not surprised.

“Yes, indeed. Just finishing up,” the professor answered casually. “You may want to rethink these two, however. Cowboys in the American West engaged in homosexual behavior,” the professor mused out loud. "But a Roman from Augustus’ time period would have never met such a person, of course.”

“Uhhh…right. Yes, sir,” Larry answered quietly, shooting a warning look towards Jedediah.

“Homo-what?” squeaked Jed indignantly.

“It means,” Octavius began, a little softer than his usual timbre.

“I know what it means,” Jed snapped. “I understand Latin!”

Octavius’ eyes widened. _Since when?!_

“Have you met our mummy yet?” Larry cut in hastily, offering the professor a hand up. “C’mon, let me introduce you to Ahkmenrah.”

The men walked off, leaving one fuming cowboy and one Roman General still processing the conversation. Unfortunately for Jed, it did not take Octavius long to do so.

“When you said you understood Latin,” Octavius ventured. Jed started, not at all expecting that topic to come up. Trust Octavius to focus on the little details.

“I guess that’s bit of an exaggeration,” Jed muttered, kicking at the floor. “I learned Latin in school, so I can read the words.” Well, the real Jedediah Smith had experienced that education anyway. “But tryin’ to understand the language comin’ outta ya mouth with your….” Jed swallowed the word ‘sexy’. “....accent is ‘nother thing entirely.”

“Why have you never told me?” Octavius folded his arms across his chest.

“What, and spoil the fun of listenin’ in on your conversations? 

“Hoc intellegere potes??” Octavius pronounced each syllable carefully. _Can you understand this?_

“That there’s ‘nother reason,” Jed snorted. “Now you’re gonna try to sneak lessons into our conversations.”

“Vere amas?” Octavius persisted.

Jed sighed and scrunched up his nose in concentration. “Do I like...people? What kinda question is that?”

“Do you like… men?” Octavius’ chin lifted as he studied the cowboy.

“Absit.” He watched Octavius’ expression harden, but not before a depth of hurt flashed across his face. “Well. Maybe. Just… one fella in particular.”

“The person who is fortunate enough to gain favor in your heart is lucky indeed,” Octavius murmured. His stomach felt queasy again, his heart beating too fast.

“You….” Jed gawped. “Yer just a sweet-talker ain’t ya? Got an answer for everything, have ya?”

“Not for the professor, though. Tibi gratias ago. I appreciate you coming to my rescue,” Octavius admitted.

“All good, Ockie. Anything for mea amor,” Jed tilted his hat. He watched in satisfaction as Octavius reddened. Even more beautiful than that was the general’s smile, tentative at first, widening with unsuppressed glee.

“Your pronunciation is horrible,” Oct whispered. He didn’t seem to mind one bit, for Jed was suddenly close. Wide brown eyes watched as the cowboy removed his hat. A soft laugh left Octavius’ throat as his hand was lifted to Jed’s lips.

“Well… I guess there are still a few things we can learn from each other, hm?” Jed smiled.

**Author's Note:**

> If my Latin is incorrect, let me know. I'd appreciate your corrections. :)
> 
> ETA: Thank you, Flame_Aurora_Scarlet for the Latin help!!


End file.
